Destination: Hong Kong

I'm going to Hong Kong.

I just found out I got in today.

Trying to let it soak in.

Awesome.

Brain Barf!

I must love and accept my awkardness! There is just no other way around it, so, I must flaunt it.

A good laugh at myself is probably needed.

Life can be taken a little too seriously.

Once in a while, stop planning. A little go-with-the-flow action.

Dabble in the creative side. Pull out the old sketchbook.

People watch, scribble it all down

Read some Doctor Seuss, only out loud and with Fun Voices!

Laugh. Do a cartwheel here and there. More giggle fits where tears stream down the cheeks.

Need to heighten the optimism, downplay the stress!

A little genuine fun, like the Waterballoon fighting, slip and sliding, rollercoaster kind of fun.

Do your shoulders feel lighter yet? A little more skip in your walk?

Can you Dance? Can you shake it like Nobody's Business?

Well, good.

The superhumans

There are incredible, hard-working, motivated, ambitious people in AIESEC. I wouldn't be in this had I not been surrounded, pushed, and inspired by them. These are the superhumans...the ones that can just keep taking more on, the energizer batteries. Seeing someone this incredible on the cusp of burning out...that scares me. While it may seem like these mentors,leaders,and friends, are capable of anything and everything, they simply can't do it all. If a person this motivated starts burning out,we all need to step it up a notch...They may think they can carry the weight of the world, and perhaps they can, but they shouldn't have to.

One step closer

Next semester is finally at my fingertips...

Characters

I'm a people watcher. It's been ingrained through the endless hours spent studying body language, facial gestures, tangible actions, subtle and not so subtle mannerisms, and on and on and on in theater I, II, III, IV,...I can't help it. But, It definitely will provide some high entertainment value this semester.

My micro TA: the quintessential econ nerd, wears his pants way too far past his belly button, has overly large red-rimmed glasses, and awkwardly annunciates every single word. "Now most TAs might preface their intro discussion with a little information on their interests and hobbies," he began..."I'm sorry to inform you that I am a pitifully boring human being. I don't do anything. I wake up between the hours of 5:30 and 6:00 am, sleep between the hours of 10 and midnight, and in between I eat, sleep, and do economics"....He also wears a special band around his left arm (yes he's a lefty, as am I) to prevent his hand from feeling like cement when he writes on the chalkboard. He takes a sip from his coffee cup every thirty seconds, and has already attempted a few jokes, only to face a silent classroom staring back at him awkwardly. Seriously, if this guy was in a movie, I'd call him too generic...But in real life he's highly amusing, sadly not purposely so.

I then have "Hot Rod" Matthews for International business, and man does that guy look like a cartoon caricature! His deep set wrinkles on his forehead and his frumpy stance can't be complete without the disarray of white hair piled on top of his head, but the best part is he can make the funniest faces, and completely on accident! His eyes will buldge just a little too far, his shoulders will shrug up past his ears, he'll crinkle his forehead, pucker out his lips and prolong the "who knows" look he's trying to convey just a wee bit longer in case anyone didn't catch the hilarity of it sooner.

You know when you're in a situation, and it's really not meant to be funny, but you have to hold back your giggle fit because letting it out would just be completely inappropriate? I'm interested to see how many more days like that I'll have this semester...

"Hurricane prompts awkward questions"

The social and racial divide is finally impossible to ignore, and all it took was a disastrous hurricane...Imagine that.

Take it easy

My goal for the year: to go on the Business School study abroad program in Hong Kong this coming spring semester. In order to apply, you need 9 business/economics credits completed by the time the program starts. There is currently one opening for this program, and I'm doing everything I possibly can to get it...this means taking two econ classes, and an international business class all in one semester...Now on top of that, I signed up for a modern spanish lit course as well as a writing intensive comparitive politics course. That is a total of 17 credits. Today, I applied for a job as a messenger with the Sergeant at Arms for the State Senate...which is a 15 hour a week commitment. I just got an email saying I have the job. This is all aside from all the AIESEC that consumes my life (which is not a negative statement, but is an essential part of my life that I have to make sure to make time for)...Now, I am an overachiever, yes. I don't mind working my ass off, this is true...but Today, I simply realized there just aren't enough hours in the week to do everything I want, and to do it well. I mean, I debated...I kept thinking just suck it up for a semester...but, I think back to people telling me I'm going to burn out if I keep pushing myself this hard, and I'm not ready to burn out quite this early...So, I dropped a class, am down to 13 credits, and I'm giving myself permission to take things easy...It's tough, let me tell you...I don't like feeling like I can't accomplish everything I want, but I've just had to face that it's the right thing to do...right?

Lunch at Lulu's

So yesterday, my mom and brother and I headed to lunch at one of our fav mideast restaurant...Lulu's. On the way in, we ran into my friend Abbie...now Abbie is an awesome girl (who I am recruiting for @ hopefully)...she took off a year and lived in Israel after high school, volunteers a ton, does all these crazy camp counceling shindigs, and is majoring in Jewish studies and philosophy...Now, we bump into her with her family...and we all ended up having lunch together. Ok seriously this was great...a Jewish family and a muslim family that don't know each other having lunch together at a middle eastern restaurant because their daughters are good friends...and it was awesome, because even though our parents might have never gotten to know each other or had the conversations we had during that hour, they kind of stumbled into it because of us...and ok so yeah I have lots of Jewish friends big deal, but seriously, this is a bigger deal for the rents. I mean, yes my parents have a few friends that are Jewish, but they probably tiptoe around very real conversations...Yesterday, they not only had lunch together, but actually TALKED about her trip to Israel and my trip to Egypt,They were actually interested in our personal experiences of the two places...They were put in situation that they probably found slightly uncomfortable, actually learned from it, and maybe even enjoyed it?... I think that's just fabulous.

Keeping Busy

All summer I felt like I had something to do, and usually, it felt somewhat purposeful or significant. I am now moved into my apartment, have purchased all my textbooks, finished Harry Potter (which was intense), bustled around campus "exploring" my new surroundings I am running out of errands!...This is the first time this whole summer where I have cable tv to watch, and the time to do it, but that feels like a waste! I may be crazy, but I hate not feeling like I have something to do or work towards...AIESEC feels like it is paused for the next two weeks, and I guess I have time to be lazy?? Which is lameeeee...

But no worries, I am already making a new list of things to get done before summer is over...and damn it, this list is going to be both purposeful AND significant!

ok my rant is over.

ALI GILMAN COME HOME

CAFTA

Ok, so in my super liberal, hippy, intellectual West High School, I took a Latin American History class...In that class, I learned that NAFTA was a cruel horrible trade agreement that solely benefited the States, and exploited Mexican workers...I learned of the Maquiladoras, of the poor working conditions, of workers that felt there only way to survive was to illegally cross the border into the states. I know that I learned a completely one-sided view on the issue, and am putting together bits and pieces of a much more complex issue, but now that CAFTA has passed, I have this sinking feeling...I don't know if I have enough information to base it on, and I could just be relying on the very emotionally-based curriculum of my high school course, but I just feel uneasy... I guess more information would be greatly appreciated, and from all sides of the story.

Apartamento

I am officially starting the new semester today by moving into my apartment! I have been counting down until this day for a greater chunk of the summer, and it is finally at my fingertips, muahahahaha. After coming back from SSC, I really can't wait to get started on next semester. SSC, like everyone said, completely refueled my passion and energy...It has officially remedied any pessimism and jaded sentiments that had built up in the streets of Cairo, and has replaced those feelings with a conquer the world sort of attitude...which is fabulous. This next semester going to be a lot of hard work, both with classes and with aiesec, but, it should also bring along a lot of fun times, and I am ready for both. I have had the greatest summer, and I honestly don't feel like I wasted a single day of it, but now I am ready for something new and nearly impossible to get thrown my way...I'm ready to work my ass off, ready to multitask, to pull all nighters, to be in two places at once, to SYNERGIZE, to learn how to cook anything other than premade mac and cheese (which, for anyone who knows me, knows this may be a bit of a challenge)...Today, I'll be sleeping in my apartment for the first time, and will officially set off this crazy semester, here I go!

Favorite Things

A Favorite Things List was started
under the Siwa midnight sky
It goes something like this

*Shooting Stars

*Tidal Waves

*Going Commando

That's as far as we got
The list is open to suggestions.

I'm back!

I am back in Madison...It feels good to see GREEN...I think I have decided that is my favorite color (not shit brown)...does that mean that my identity crisis is over? You may think I am joking, but in a way it's true...This past year has been such a phenomenal experience for me; If you were to ask me last summer who I would be in a year, I would have drawn a blank and answered offhandedly that I would most likely be the same person, just one year older... I have spent a great part of this past year breaking down my values bit by bit, and seperating my family's from my own. I have struggled with huge concepts; religion, relationships, independence. I was a mess first semester, and was lucky to have a huge support system and an amazing friend to walk me through it. But, not until I joined AIESEC and met the incredible people within it did I finally feel like I had successfully begun sorting out my priorities, my goals, my passions.

I went back to Egypt for the first time in two years, and for the first time, I didn't mold into the person they wanted me to be. I held my own, I argued, I debated, I gave my family a glimpse of the person I am and the things I stand for, and it felt GREAT! I had my fair share of frustrating conversations, days when my sarcasm took over, and days when I felt completely jaded. At times it just feels easier to slip into their world and be the person they want you to be just to make everyone feel comfortable, but...to hell with comfortable! That's what we're here to do right? Raise some questions, think about the world in a new way, and make others do the same...stir it up, little darling stir it up...(sorry marley took over) I have had the most eventful three and a half weeks in Egypt, and for the first time, I have finally gotten to SEE Egypt; I experienced the world of Siwa, camping under the stars in a desert oasis, completely different than the hectic lifestyle in Cairo that had come to define this country for me for the past decade and a half...Thanks to everyone that made this trip what it was...To the AIESEC crew in the homeland, especially the inspirational KAITLIN, who is about to begin a new chapter, BEST OF LUCK! To my Madison LC, I am so excited for this next semester! And to the person who keeps me motivated, you're the John Galt in this story.

So, yes, my favorite color is green

And I am back.

Friday, SSC In Denver...and the journey continues...

I'm a smoker, sweetheart

Good times with Michael Bolton, and the guy who wears his shirt...

Una semana mas...

I was rescued by kaitlin Mike and Ryan. The rest of my stay in 3ageeba was as it should be, pleasant and relaxing.

Kaitlin and I were asked if we were engaged or married by two ten year old strangers, and when we answered that we were single, they softly shook their heads and said, "haram, rabenah yesahel" loosly translated to I'm sorry, may God make it easier for you.

My tolerance for crazies is just about at its peak...pictured above is a prime example

Feeling a little too cynical lately

A few restless nights, disturbing dreams, pesky flies

A bit of mental exhaustion

I miss State Street

Is it bad that I'm ready to go back?

Less than stellar

Any place this beautiful, no matter how remote the surroundings, should lead to good times with the right company...Let's just begin by saying the company is less than stellar...

This is a view from our cottage..This beach, 3ageeba, right on the Med Sea is one of my favorite places. I actually like the fact that there isn't a café-filled, disco-teched out night life, and that I can swim all day, nap read and walk around outside at night...But apparently my idea of a relaxing trip is not what others would call enjoyable...My Texan cousins are on this trip...I think the quote that best sums up my cousin's personality is..."wouldn't it be cool to have a hummer in Egypt?!"...she actually said that...ya, that's what I am faced with. Reading is apparently an absurd hobby, and good music consists of Britney Spears and other pop bands...my music taste is ridiculous, my ambition is strange to say the least, and my sarcasm is outright cruel. According to these cousins from down south, what this place is missing is air conditioning, a night life, and a few hummers here and there just to make things really good.

I haven't even started on the Egyptians...There are now two men that tell bad Egyptian jokes, sing much more often than they should, and push buttons way past their limits, my father and his best friend. That's right, I now have to deal with two of my father. When they get together, they tell corny joke after corny joke, and everyone actually laughs, except of course my brother and I...they all then realize we're not laughing, decide we don't understand arabic well enough to get the hillarity of the said joke, and explain why it is so great...this happens after every joke...every single one. The fact that we just find the jokes as painful as rusty nails gouging our eyes out just never really occurs to them...

I am then shoved into a room to greet more family friends, and as I'm shaking my mom's friend's hand she says, "Oh my God what happened to your face?!" I stare back blankly trying to figure out what the hell she's talking about, and she continues, "your face! Oh my God you poor girl! What are all those dark spots on your face! This is just not right, you have permanent scars!," I finally figure out she's talking about a small scar that has tanned darker than the rest of my skin...and she continues doing so for about ten minutes as I awkwardly stare back trying to grab my hand away....

Their daughter then decides it is time she tells me about the ways of love...I am, of course, the naive American girl who is sadly driven by ambitions and careers and success, and who doesn't realize the importance of romance, loving unconditionally, sacrifice, emotional dependence, and marriage...apparently marriage should be one of my top priorities at this point...I should realize that love at first sight could hit me at any moment, and that when it does, I should be able to drop everything to make my husband happy...my husband is, of course, the head of the household, so wherever he decides to move me (which will obviously be Egypt since he will, of course, be Egyptian), i will have to agree to in order to please his every need, because his career is obviously more important than my own. God gets upset, I was reminded, when a perfectly good man comes along and we turn him away because he is not everything...we are in fact put on this Earth to procreate, and although careers are a fun little hobby, the job at hand is of course to make babies. She, of course, can speak from experience, since she has been in one relationship 3 years ago, and she is now at the wise wise age of 22.

I am anxiously awaiting the arrival of Kaitlin, Williams, and Ryan...this place is too beautiful to be spent with people like this...

Siwa

Adventures in Hurghada

It's three in the morning and I just got back from Hurghada...

My sleep schedule is all confused; I don't think I will make much of an effort to fix it for the next three weeks...
Any who, Hurghada...a tourist magnet on the Red Sea where there are fewer Egyptians than topless Europeans and old men in Speedos...soooo awkward. We got there by taking a microbus. Let me just say that the only way I survived that trip without dying of a heart attack was attempting to sleep the whole way there. I woke up, several times, only to notice that we were driving into oncoming traffic...but we made it, which is good. This was not the typical Sadek family vacation, which usually consists of waking up somewhere between noon and two and bumming around on the beach...everyone was surprisingly ready to actually DO something, which I found amazing.

The first day we were up by seven...SEVEN! The day consisted of banana boating and windsurfing and such...Adam and Trent, this windsurfing instructor was determined to prove that he was a better teacher than hoofers...he wasn't by any means, and would say odd phrases like "do macarena macarena," expecting us to understand what that meant.... Another odd thing...When we started the whole windsurfing ordeal, they asked us if we were Egyptian (Egyptians get better deals apparently)...now my Egyptian cousins are the ones dealing with this, so they of course say yes, but then my cousins and I start babbling in English and the guy feels like he has been cheated. Throughout the lesson, he proceeds to tell me how much he hates America and Americans, and I found myself constantly feeling like I had to prove to him that I was more Egyptian than American...which is ridiculous, especially since I identify more with being American than Egyptian. The good thing is, I was able to hold my own, express myself in Arabic, and basically make him feel like an ass...which I couldn't really do a week ago...which is good.

Now the fun stuff...I went scuba diving for the first time. At first it felt panicky and claustrophobic, because breathing under water defies any sense of logic...but, then I got the hang of the whole breathing in and out business (which is tricky, let me tell you!). Saw three huge eels, one which was probably within 10 feet, and a shark off in the distance (which I tried to run away from, but the instructor wouldn't let me...damn him)...

Overall, this has probably been one of the most productive trips to Egypt I've had...and I've been here less than a week...Thursday, off to Siwa with the AIESEC crew...

More later

Blogging from the Homeland

So I'm finally in Cairo. Our airport experience quickly reminded me of the lack or organization in this city...After two of our six bags (yes six, only three of us...the explanation: my mother is crazy) were frantically thrown onto a vacant bus which then took off without us, the following hour consisted of my mother throwing a hissy fit about the disorganization of the airport system, the city of Cairo, as well as the entire Egyptian government, screaming at airport managers left and right until we finally got our bags...I never knew my mother had it in her...

This situation also made me realize how frustrating the language barrier is for me...I was asked to explain the situation and through my anger and frustration I just couldn't articulate nearly as well as I wanted to just how pissed off I was, and ended up instead looking like a stammering spoiled American idiot...so my goal is to speak arabic whenever possible here, no easy way outs...

But despite the minor setbacks, I love it here.

It's been two days and so far it's surreal. I have spent time with my family, gone out to cafés with my cousins, and met up with Kaitlin for some much needed comfort. The hardest part has been leaving behind something that was so amazing and that made me so happy, knowing that when I return it won't be there anymore...Being so far removed from Madison has made the situation especially difficult...I keep looking for something tangible to hold onto...luckily, Egypt itself is just that...the smell of the shisha at the cafés, the references to places I've heard amazing memories about, and my own plans to explore a new side of Egypt for the next three weeks make me feel connected and in a way comforted.

It's hard, but at the same time it is perfect. I'm looking forward to whatever comes my way in the next three years...I have ambitious plans, and know that I will be pursuing them 110%...

As for the future, I hope it will lead me towards what has made the past three months incredible, but right now, it's time to be independent, be strong, and blow some shit up...

Egyo

I fly to Cairo July 13th...here is the tentative plan: The July 16-20th in Gharda2a, 20-22 back in Cairo, 23-29 in 3ageeba near Marsa Matrouh, and the rest of my sweet sweet time will be spent with AIESECERS (get ready Kaitlin!) I come back the 6th...It has been an amazing summer in the Mad city...class, work, sailing, windsurfing, aiesecing, taking our awesome trainee around with ALI, buying art and feeling really cool, and bumming around with a wanna-be Egyo...It's hard to think that I won't be coming back to the comforts of Gilman street, but I guess the best way to look at this is this:
I am setting higher goals for myself than I ever thought possible
I am having the best few months of my life
I am making the most out of the time I have
I am happy

If nothing else, I will always have my memories of this summer

All I have to say is, my flight to Cairo will be a long one...